Okay, I understand wanting to spice things up a bit. I have no problem with being adventurous, but checking into the ER just to get your rocks off is insane.
Apparently, a older man was going along for the ride with a much younger women. We have seen her before, all the ER's know her a little too well. She is the patient that complains of abdominal pain and vaginal conditions while requesting not to have anyone in the room with the doctor during her pelvic exams. She has a fetish for gyno beds and anything, male or female in a lab coat. Well, today was her day. She checked in for a headache, which shocked us because it meant no pelvic exam. However, she had a friend with her. I had to go and do the nursing assessment on her. As I walked into her room, I heard the shuffle of pants being pulled up. There she was buck naked, kneeling on the floor in front of this "friend", with a smirk on her face. He looked mortified, she just crawled over to me and stated, "I have always wanted to play with you" My first reaction, which I had to suppress, was to snatch her by the head and drag her out of the ER. However, I just walked out. The guy took off, security called the cops. After arresting her for lewd behavior and three other offenses, my poor ER doc still had to treat her for the headache prior to them taking her to jail. He gave her 1 gram of Tylenol
What I am wondering....
1. WTF would make her think anyone in the ER would allow her to touch us with a 10 foot pole?
2. WTF is would make her want to have sex in the ER?
3. Why was she completely naked to give a man head?
4. What is it with some people and the pelvic beds?
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